Area Man Has No Idea Why He Keeps Stats at Games

St. Louis Cardinal fan Frank Trankler admires his stat sheet where Pujols had an RBI and Adam Wainwright had "around 7 or 8 strikeouts." Trankler went on to throw the program away and grab a hot dog.

Area Cardinal fan Frank Trankler admitted today that he has no idea why he keeps stats during St. Louis Cardinals games at Busch Stadium. Trankler has kept stats at every game he’s attended since the age of 19. Trankler, now 48, has attended 4-5 games at old and New Busch Stadium since “he can remember,” and has finally taken a step back to question a time-honored tradition that he has observed for all these years.

“Not really sure why I do it,” Trankler said of his statistical habit, “My dad always did it when he went to games so I guess I just picked it up from him. Every game I’ll pay like 6 damn dollars for a program just so I can keep stats. I guess in retrospect it’s kinda expensive since I don’t really get anything out of it.”

To date, Trankler has spent nearly $500 on a hobby that he calls “just something to do,” and “tedious.” Trankler admittedly throws away the program upon exiting the stadium and has been known to give up keeping stats around the 7th or 8th inning on numerous occasions. “It kinda gets to be a pain in the ass after a while,” Trankler admitted, “especially when I was in my 20s and all my buddies went to games with me. We’d usually get drunk and start heckling the opposing team’s bullpein about the 6th and how am I supposed to keep up with every at bat with that going on? Plus every time I have to take a pee or get a hot dog, I have to ask my wife to keep track while I’m gone. That woman doesn’t even know what an RBI is, let alone if something is an out on a 1-3 play or a 3 unassisted.”

“I guess I always thought it would be cool to look back at if something big happened that game,” Trankler continued, “Like if I would have been there when McGwire hit 70, or a no-hitter or something. Sure, I was taking stats when McGwire hit a home run, but it was some insignificant number, like 23  I think. Who wants to remember that?”

Trankler said that while he now realizes that his hobby during games is completely pointless to him, he will most likely continue the tradition. “The way I see it, it’s either that or talk to my wife the whole time and that’s not gonna happen,” Trankler said before turning on the Blues game, “I haven’t scored there in like 6 years. There’s a stat for ya.”


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